Well, time for Round two. Since I had already been through the process I wasn’t nervous this time at all. Just mentally prepared for another rough Day 3. So here we go…
Day 1- Day 5
Yup, thats it…nothing happen. I was also having a pretty rough week at work as well. Someone was on vacation so we were understaffed and I was under A LOT of pressure but I never went crazy. No emotional breakdowns! I don’t know how to feel about that. I am relieved that I didn’t have a crying fit or any awful headaches. But at the same time I am a little nervous that nothing happen. I don’t know why I feel like its not going to work this time and then we will have to go see the RE. I don’t mind if it ends up that way I just really want it to work. I am on Day 13 right now. Time to do the deed for the next few days then 2WW. Lets hope for 2 pinks lines in my near future.
I had a very long conversation with my friend, Frankie* and it was very refreshing. I am gradually telling my immediate friends and family about my blog. I should say family and friends that are positive, open-minded, and very close to me. So, I let her read it and it was very nice to be able to talk to someone, have then ask questions, and just have someone to be supportive. Her words(paraphrased), ” Its hard to empathize because I can’t really relate to your situation. If you ever need someone to talk to I am here.” And that is why I am sharing this with people now. I know it sounds kind of selfish but one reason I want to start sharing this is to have that support of being able to not just talk to people who know or can relate to what I am going through but my friends as well. I was holding in all this information and all these feelings because I didn’t think that they would understand, they would be judgmental, or they would think I am overreacting. But Frankie’s* reaction, and knowing she is very open-minded, just proved that sharing this with people validate everything I was thinking. My friends are my friends for a reason. They aren’t going to run away at the first sign of crazy. I mean Em* didn’t even want to tell me about her pregnancy because she was afraid of how I would feel. That is wonderful of her but it just shows what kind of friend I was being for letting her think thats what she had to do. So, share time for me. My blog isn’t going to change and I am still going to share all the same things Now, more people will be reading it…EEKKK!