Last weekend was exhausting and full of babies and kids! I was never so grateful for this weekend to be over. Don’t get me wrong; I love my friends and their kids. But when its your dream and you have to be surrounded by it for a weekend, it can be a little much.
Saturday was Mine and Josh’s day. We went to a Flea Market in the morning, a local one I had never been to before, which was a good time. We didn’t find much but it was a fun and rather interesting experience. After that Josh’s back was hurting so I dropped him off at home then went to Sprint(cancelled my Verizon) to get a new phone, S5 which I love so far. After 2 hours there I had to rush home because we said we where going to be at our friends house at 4PM, it was 345PM when I got home, and there house is 20 minutes away. The reason we were going to visit that friend because she had her second child(a baby girl) in July and we hadn’t seen her yet. Every Infertile knows that babies are the roughest to see. Toddlers can be rough too but newborns and babies are the hardest to be around. Now, this little girl is adorable and a spitting image of her Daddy. And her smile…melts the heart! The visit wasn’t going that bad. The friend that had the baby is a nurse so I was chatting with her about everything that has been going on with me. Even she was curious as to why more hasn’t been done and that I have only received Clomid. But with the break coming we are holding off on what is to come. We chatted for a bit and she then informed me that Em* was coming over. With her 34 week pregnant self and their one year old. Em* is my best friend but I knew the second them two got together it was going to be all about pregnancy stuff. Which it was for a while. It wasn’t that bad but it was kind of difficult hearing it all over again when I want it so bad. At one point while we were there Josh was outside with my friends older son(3years old) and Em’s* daughter. My friend was talking about how great Josh is with kids and how he should open a Daddy Daycare because that and how much kids love him. It was a spear to the heart. I know that he is amazing with kids. The second kids are around they gravitate to him and I can’t give him that. Its the most devastating thing to have to deal with on a daily basis. I just shrugged it off and said, “Yea, he is great with them.” Then changed the subject. As we where getting ready to leave her son said, “Josh can you stay? You can sleep on the couch? Ill ask my mom!!!” It was adorable, then he held the baby. It was a lot to take in, in such a short period of time.
Once we were leaving I was so relieved to be away from all the kids and babies and bellies. But when we were leaving Em’s* car stopped at the top of the street. We pulled up next to them and they asked if we wanted to go get food. Obviously, I DID, I didn’t eat all day but I just wanted to go home and self loath for a little bit. We ended up going out to eat with them and it was so worth it. Being around their daughter is rough knowing that we started trying the same time so, technically, we could be getting ready to have our second kid right now like they are…but we aren’t. But at dinner their daughter was my little buddy. She kept playing with me and smiling at me ALL through dinner. I was loving all the baby attention I was getting. It made the whole day worth it!
The next day I had a baby shower to go to. It was (we will call her)Amber’s* baby shower(twin babies 1 round of Clomid lady). Through the corse of Mine and Lynn’s* friendship I have become friends with one of her friends who was also there. This woman also knows the struggles of the baby shower and so it was nice knowing I wasn’t alone in this day. We had out side conversations and made it through. Even with Amber* looking so beautifuly pregnant and all of us being extremely jealous of her happiness. We all had to leave early(most of my table had a benefit to go to and i had to drive an hour away to my grandmas birthday party) and there was about 60+ people so this girl had A LOT of gifts to open. Leaving early was us leaving after food and and hour and a half of presents being opened…and she was still in the process when we left.
I was thrilled for my weekend to be over. Newborns, toddlers, and baby bellies all weekend! It wasn’t as bad as I thought it was going to be. I was expecting to be depressed the whole weekend after each event but I wasn’t. I was emotionally drained from it but not as sad as I thought. Don’t get me wrong, I was sad but there where no tears shed for this girl. Im ready for our 2ww to begin….and then end. So, we can get this journey going.